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Softening body language as a way to connect

Through our gestures, facial expressions, and postures we speak volumes. Our body language reveals our emotions, intentions, and openness to connection. We can feel a sense of connection, even without exchanging a single word.

Let’s embark on a mindful journey to soften body language, transforming how we show up. Let’s cultivate warmth, inviting deeper connections, all while holding our boundaries with grace.

Body-scan meditation for softer body language

I find a quiet space and nestle in comfortably. As I read the meditation, I focus on the natural rhythm of my breathing for a few moments. I imagine myself grounded like a strong tree, rooted in the earth, and feeling more and more centered, relaxed and open, as I begin to release worries and tensions from my mind and body.

As I inhale, I imagine openness and warmth entering my being. As I exhale, I release any worries and tensions.

Abdomen and diaphragm

I bring my awareness to my abdomen and diaphragm. Does this area feel tense, hindering full breath and full expression. I visualise how my diaphragm softens and relaxes, like a flower that opens up. This allows for deeper, more relaxed breathing. I feel how the tensions release and dissipate. I feel a sense of calm arise.

As I inhale, I embrace openness and warmth. As I exhale, I let go of any worries and fears that was held within by the tightness. I am releasing tightness by regulating any emotional burdens held in my body. I am patient on the journey of softening my body language.

Shoulders and back

I imagine shining the soft healing light of my awareness onto my shoulders and back. I acknowledge any tensions and strain as if carrying a weight. I open up my posture like a flower unfolding by releasing any built-up tensions and strain, creating space for ease and confidence. With each exhale, I naturally let go of and release any weight that I may be carrying. I feel the weight and tensions lifting, transforming my outward expressions. I embrace the power of lightness and liberation.

As I inhale, I embrace openness and warmth. As I exhale, let go of worries and tension. I feel my body settle comfortably. I feel a softening within – a feeling I carry with me throughout the day – allowing my body language to be a gentle invitation to connect and a reflection of my authentic self.


I now take a minute or two to observe my arms. If I notice any tight or closed posture like crossed arms, I ask myself – is it a sign of defensiveness, am I creating a wall around my heart – or is this a habitual posture? I visualise how my arms gently unfold and open like a flower, welcoming diverse, peaceful thoughts and experiences. I pay attention to how, moment by moment – any constriction loosens and makes room for a sense of resilience, vitality, invitation and connection.

As I inhale, I embrace openness and warmth. As I exhale, I let go of a habitual protective posture.


Now, I observe my hands to notice any tensions in them. Are they tense, or slightly clenched, holding onto worry or fear? I imagine my hands gently opening, like flowers reaching towards the sun, radiating warmth and receptivity. I feel the tensions release, making room for ease and openness to connection.

As I inhale, I embrace openness and warmth. As I exhale, I release habitual worries and fears, and I embrace the flow of life energy through my hands.


Now, I bring my awareness to my neck area, noticing any tightness or stiffness. I visualise the soft golden light of my awareness gently soothing, relaxing and softening my neck. I pay attention to the body sensations in my neck area, which releases any latent emotions and tensions, loosening up any restricted mobility – allowing a sense of freedom, grace and confidence.

As I inhale, I embrace openness and confidence. As I exhale, I release any forcing, resistance or defensiveness, allowing myself to be fully present in the moment.


I gently turn my attention to my facial expression. Is my forehead strained, creating an unintentional barrier? Are my lips pursed, perhaps expressing disapproval even before I’ve heard the other person speak? I take a deep breath and release any tension held in my facial muscles.

As I inhale, I visualize a warm, welcoming expression spreading across my face. I imagine my face softening, my lips gently smiling, my eyes conveying interest and attentiveness – a slight head tilt expressing interest in what others have to say. I embody a relaxed, open posture. I create an inviting atmosphere for connection and communication.

As I exhale, I let go of judgment and criticism, allowing genuine interest and curiosity to shine through. I feel myself radiating openness and receptivity, ready to engage with others in a meaningful way.


I now move my attention to my brow. Is my brow furrowed with worry and tension? Is it a sign of real or habitual concern? Perhaps skepticism or disapproval? I consciously relax my brow muscles, gently smoothing away all lines. I feel the weight of habitual rigidity, worry and tension lifting. I acknowledge that I am resilient, calm and able.

As I inhale, I envision my brow lifting and softening slightly, conveying release, openness and receptivity to new ideas and perspectives. As I exhale, I release any preconceived ideas and judgments, allowing interactions and conversations to unfold naturally.


Now, I  bring my awareness to my jaw. I recognise that if I habitually clench my jaw, this can create an unconscious barrier, signaling tension, worry and a reluctance to connect. I consciously soften my jawline, releasing any tightness held within. I let go of strain and tension. I invite a sense of serenity and openness. I inhale deeply, and as I exhale, I release any anxieties that reside within the tightness.

As I inhale, I breathe in acceptance and empathy. As I exhale, I let go of any need to control the conversation or the outcome, allowing the interaction to flow freely.


Finally, I bring the soft light of my awareness to my eyes. I imagine my eyes soft and at ease, conveying curiosity, interest and warmth. I become aware of any lingering tension, strain or uneasiness, and by paying non-judgemental attention to the sensations, all the tensions start to melt away.

As I inhale, I visualize making eye contact with an open, present heart. As I exhale, I release any habitual sense of judgment or suspicion, allowing myself to connect on a deeper level.


If I notice an unintentional frown, I practice to relax my facial muscles, which enables me to acknowledge others with warm and welcoming facial expressions and body language.

If I notice that I am pursing my lips or furrowing my brow, which could project a judgmental or disappointed expression, I notice my this and I take a mindful breath and consciously relax my facial muscles.

My softened features prevent sending unintended signals and instead cultivate an open and accepting presence, allowing for clarity, understanding, trust and connection. As I practice through meditation, affirmations, reappraisal techniques and applying it in real life, I observe how my habits and interactions shift over time.

Affirmations for Softening Body Language

I am helping to create a world where connection flows and boundaries are held effortlessly through open body language:

  • I choose to embody resilience, relaxation, kindness and understanding through my body language.
  • My posture reflects my confidence, fairness, boundaries and open-heartedness.
  • My gestures invite connection and positive interactions, while also holding my boundaries.
  • I practise to embody a relaxed or friendly expression and to open my posture.
  • I radiate warmth and approachability through my nonverbal cues.
  • My softened body language is a gentle invitation to connect.
  • I am mindful of the impact my body language has on others.
  • I am patient with myself and I celebrate my progress.
  • I give myself the joy of deeper connections.
Sabine Thomas

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