Letting go

Pressures and expectations are a natural part of life, but at times it can get a bit too much or may seem unbearable. Finding good ways to cope with pressure can be life-changing.

Without even realising it, we may put too much pressure on ourselves and on others. When we experience too much pressure, everything can become harder and we may feel overwhelmed. We may experience a constant sense of urgency, and we may not be able to get calm enough to cope. We may not have enough time or resources available to meet the demands. Being productive or having some time to recharge may seem next to impossible to do.

How does one cope when unrealistic expectations and too much pressure are sabotaging our efforts? How can we overcome the struggle of becoming paralyzed by too much pressure?

Each of us perceive, manage and cope with pressures in our own unique ways. We are also our own best ally when it comes to understanding ourselves, to unwind the pressure and to create the coping skills we need to turn the pressures into a motivating force for constructive actions.

What strategies has helped you to cope with pressure and how do you prevent putting too much pressure on yourself?

Letting go meditation

I offer compassion to myself by acknowledging my struggles when experiencing too much pressure. I acknowledge that letting go can be a challenge. I am learning to let go.

During this meditation, I pay attention to the body sensations of my emotions without judgement, without trying to change them. The inner turmoil will fade away, until it is completely processed. I disengage from intrusive thoughts and let them fade out and float away.

I am learning to take it easy, if my plans don’t work out. I recognise that unexpected things can happen. I leave the past behind with all the story lines. I am grounded in the present moment.

I am learning to let go.
I am learning to take it easy so that I can unwind.
I let go of the beliefs that get me feeling frustrated.
I let go of self-imposed and peer pressure.
I let go of unrealistic expectations.
I let go of taking things personally.
I let go of patterns of reactivity.
I let go of disappointments.
I let go of mistakes.
I let go of blame.

When I relax and recharge, I feel much better.
When I let go, I become open to new perspectives.

I lean into action and optimistic thinking.
I lean into relaxing and recharging.
I accept myself and others as we are.
I relieve the pressure by letting go.

Affirmations: Letting go

• I am learning to cope with expectations and demands
• I notice and acknowledge when pressure becomes too much
• I accept that I cannot control everything that happens
• I develop healthy strategies for coping with pressure
• I figuer out how to function better under pressure
• I make sure that my expectations line up with reality
• I chunk a big task down into manageable parts
• I do not expect myself to finish everything at once
• I cannot demand things from ‘the universe’
• I use my time wisely, I focus on priorities
• I allow myself to focus on realistic optimistic thinking

• I see my abilities to cope with demands in a positive light
• I notice more of what I get right
• I allow myself to feel confident
• I allow myself to feel optimistic
• I engage in revitalising activities
• Less pressure = better living
• I organise, filter and prioritise
• I can do it – one by one
• I talk things through
• My abilities shift
• I do my best

• I embrace reality and the flow of events
• I let go of unrealistic expectations
• I let go of the idea that I am not good enough
• I let go of the urge to prove my worth to others
• I let go of comparing myself with others
• I let go ‘should’ and ‘shouldn’t’
• I let go of a sense of obligation
• I love and approve of myself, as I am

• I connect with my inner peace by letting go
• I let go of the past
• I let go of limiting beliefs
• I let go of unfair experiences
• I let go of mistakes
• I let go of self criticism
• I let go of blame and regret
• I let go of guilt and shame
• I let go of grudges
• Letting go connects me with my inner peace
• I focus on the present

Reappraisals: Pressure

When I feel overwhelmed by too much pressure… When I feel unable to cope… I pay attention to the body sensations of my emotions as to regulate them. If the sensations are too intense, I can use my will to reduce their intensity to be tolerable – so that the emotions can be processed.

I strive to be realistic. I recognise that no one can do everything. I re-evaluate unrealistic expectations. I make a point of managing the pressures of daily life. I figure out healthy coping strategies. I adopt strong boundaries and time-management strategies.

I get counselling or therapy to deal with any mental health issues like depression or anxiety. I talk things through with someone, like a friend, counsellor or therapist. This allows me to acknowledge the emotional experiences in a safe environment. I can explore the origin and effects of too much pressure, expectations and overthinking. I can look at strategies to reduce pressure and let go.

Over time I can develop strategies for experiencing those chaotic days without getting overwhelmed. I can find ways to reappraise the pressures and reduce their emotional impact to such a degree that it can become manageable or even motivational. I engage in activities that help me to relieve pressure, to feel calm, to recharge and to relax.

I let go of story lines of the past – the past does not define me and the past is not a predictor of the future. I learn from experiences, I regulate emotions and let all unpleasant memories fade away. I let go of fixating on something that is from the past or future. I can only access the now, I embrace the now, which is constantly changing. I am present right now.

I nurture rational and grounded perspectives and beliefs. I reappraise irrational beliefs. When believing that something should be a certain way causes me to suffer, I reappraise those irrational beliefs and perceptions and I embrace reality. I can change my beliefs and perceptions.

I can influence an outcome, but I cannot completely bend things to my will. If I notice that anger, frustration or depression is creeping into my life, or when something I want doesn’t happen, I acknowledge the emotions and affirm that I will be ok, with or without it.

I enjoy the now, I do what I need to do – I am enough. Happiness is a natural part of living in the now. Peace is within me right now. Right now, I am present, I am at peace.